How to Make the Right Decision on Sexual Relationship

Your decision today is the seed that will speak for your tomorrow.

Decision Making skill is one of the best skills a person can develop in order to attain personal success in life.

Your decision will determine your destination.

Decision making skill is the ability to make the right choices that will bring you blessings in life and not destruction.

Sexual relationship is a kind of relationship where a person is sexually active (I mean engage in sexual activity) with his/her partner.

A lot of people today and living a life of regret and pain because of poor decisions they made.

As a youth or single, for you to achieve a healthy sexual relationship in the future, you must make the right decisions today.

A lot of young people are in the dilemma of whether to become sexually active or not, whether to stop or start a relationship, whether to have a kid now or focus on their school or even whether to get married or remain single. These are some of the issues that run through the heart of many.

Sexual issues are no casual issues.

You must not be too quick to make sexual decisions because whatever you do will have a profound effect on your destiny and success in life.

Your decisions about sexual relationship will affect your life plans, health, finance, family, career and relationship with God—I mean everything about YOU.

Why People Make Wrong Decisions on Sexual Relationship

1.       Sexual feelings: A lot of people enter into a sexual relationship because of their sexual drive not because of love. When a person cannot lead his/her sexual feelings, then will be influence negatively by those feelings and will try to seek satisfaction for their sexual need.

2.       Peer pressure and associations: It is true that iron sharpens iron and like begat like. This is law of association. We become like the people will align ourselves with. Many people enter into sexual relationship because their friends are all sexually active and they want to have sense of belonging.

3.       The mass media deception: The media (most especially internet, television and music) has done a lot of harm to our youth in the society. The media have presented a society that sees nothing wrong with people entering sexual relationship before getting married. The media has taken hold of the mind of young people and this has influenced people negatively into entering into sexual relationship.

4.       Ignorance: This is really a big virus affecting so many young people. So many entering into sexual relationship without knowing the impact of sexual involvement on one’s life. Of a truth, people are destroyed for lack of knowledge.  Lack of proper sex education is really affecting our churches, families, schools and society at large.

5.       Taking of harmful drugs and alcohol: Drugs and alcohol has a strong power to affect our emotions negatively. This can lead us into making wrong decision on sexual relationship. Most young people who began drinking and smoking will always crown it with sexual activity.

6.       The god of Condom: A lot of young people are influence into sexual relationship because of the myth of safe sex…the use of condoms and contraceptives. They belief that has long as they can purchase a condom they are ready for sexual involvement.

7.       Family background and environment place a large role in forming our sexual identity. Parents who have a poor sexual lifestyle will end up breeding kids who will grow up into making wrong decisions on sexual relationship. Our environment reveals the people’s culture and belief system. For example, an environment that sees nothing wrong with homosexuality and prostitution tend to raise up people with such a sexual lifestyle.

The impact of Wrong Decision on Sexual Relationship

1.       It can lead to sexual abuse and molestation.

2.       It can lead to abortion and its complications.

3.       It can lead to unwanted pregnancy.

4.       It can lead to heart break, emotional trauma/psychological stress.

5.       It can lead to contracting STIs and HIV/AIDS.

6.       It destroys destiny and careers.

7.       It brings separation between you and God.

8.       It brings loss of virginity.

9.       It brings loss of self respect and self esteem.

10.   It can cause financial setback and struggle.

Here are some factors that will influence you towards making the right decision concerning sexual relationship.

1.       Seek the truth about sex and its purpose from the Word of God and not from friends or the mass media.

2.       Ask the Holy Spirit, who is called the Spirit of Truth, to guide you into making the right decision towards any sexual issue. The Holy Spirit also gives power to resist temptation and also ability to control our sexual feelings.

3.       Associate with Wise Counselors and people who believe in sexual purity. This will affect your decision on whether it is necessary to involve in sexual relationship or not. Remember Iron sharpens iron.

4.       Patience is a virtue. I have learned this lesson the hard way. A lot of young people are in a hurry to satisfy their sexual urge and are not willing to wait for their time. When you have this virtue of patience, it will influence your decision not to rush into sexual relationship because you see others in it.

5.       Your relationship with God matters when making sexual decisions. You must ask yourself that, “Should I seek to satisfy and please my flesh or to make my Heavenly Father Happy?” which is more important.

Some benefits of making the Right Decisions on Sexual Relationship

1.       It will protect your destiny and purpose.

2.       It bring protect your honor, glory, dignity and respect.

3.       It will preserve you from STIs and HIV/AIDs.

4.       It will help you to become responsible and focus.

5.       Sexual purity clarifies your vision and direction to your destination.

6.       It will help you to avoid regret, set back, heart break and unnecessary emotional/mentral drainage.

7.       It will help you to achieve your goal.

8.       It builds your self esteem and confidence.

9.       It helps you to build a strong relationship with God and people.

Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend that gives you sexual satisfaction?

Are you thinking of entering a new sexual relationship?

Let this article lead you into making the right decision that will build your life and help you to reach the height you desire in life.

Rufus E. Yamoah

Sexual Morality Counselor

Bible Answers to Lies About Sex

1.       LIE: Homosexuality is acceptable.

•God created Adam for Eve. (“Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” So the LORD God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one. He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals. But still there was no helper just right for him. So the LORD God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the LORD God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. Then the LORD God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man. “At last!” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.’” This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” Genesis 2:18-24 NLT) •It is clearly stated as detestable. (“Don’t you realize that those who do wrong will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Don’t fool yourselves. Those who indulge in sexual sin, or who worship idols, or commit adultery, or are male prostitutes, or practice homosexuality, or are thieves, or greedy people, or drunkards, or are abusive, or cheat people—none of these will inherit the Kingdom of God.” 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 NLT)

2. LIE: A person can be born gay.

•We were created in God's image to be holy as he is holy, so it is impossible to be born gay if God said it's a sin. Also he commanded us to be fruitful and multiply, which gay people cannot naturally do. Therefore, if a person could be born gay, they would naturally be able to join together for procreation. (“Then God said, “Let us make human beings in our image, to be like us. They will reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, the livestock, all the wild animals on the earth, and the small animals that scurry along the ground.” So God created human beings in his own image. In the image of God he created them; male and female he created them. Then God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth and govern it. Reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, and all the animals that scurry along the ground.”” Genesis 1:26-28 NLT)

2.       LIE: A person can be born the wrong sex. (Transgender)

•When God created us, he created us with a specific purpose; hence, it doesn't mean that he made a mistake just because we don't align with his purpose for us. (““I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb. Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.”” Jeremiah 1:5 NLT) (“God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through?” Numbers 23:19) (“The LORD is righteous in everything he does; he is filled with kindness.” Psalms 145:17 NLT)

 4. LIE: Sex before marriage is socially acceptable and is now a norm, so it should be acceptable and expected to happen.

•We should govern ourselves according to God's word and not worldly standards because they're ever changing, but the word remains the same. (“Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.” Hebrews 13:4 NLT) (“But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband. So I say to those who aren’t married and to widows—it’s better to stay unmarried, just as I am. But if they can’t control themselves, they should go ahead and marry. It’s better to marry than to burn with lust.” 1 Corinthians 7:2, 8-9 NLT)

 5. LIE: Having a mistress/side chick/cheating is acceptable, especially if you're not satisfied in your relationship.

(““Therefore, I will throw her on a bed of suffering, and those who commit adultery with her will suffer greatly unless they repent and turn away from her evil deeds.” Revelation 2:22) (““At that time I will put you on trial. I am eager to witness against all sorcerers and adulterers and liars. I will speak against those who cheat employees of their wages, who oppress widows and orphans, or who deprive the foreigners living among you of justice, for these people do not fear me,” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies.” Malachi 3:5) (“I have seen your adultery and lust, and your disgusting idol worship out in the fields and on the hills. What sorrow awaits you, Jerusalem! How long before you are pure?”” Jeremiah 13:27 NLT) (“But the man who commits adultery is an utter fool, for he destroys himself.” Proverbs 6:32 NLT) (““Do not defile yourself by having sexual intercourse with your neighbor’s wife.” Leviticus 18:20 NLT)

6. LIE: Having a sexual relationship in exchange for gifts, money, status, an opportunity etc. is acceptable.

(“A prostitute is a dangerous trap; a promiscuous woman is as dangerous as falling into a narrow well.” Proverbs 23:27) (“For the lips of an immoral woman are as sweet as honey, and her mouth is smoother than oil. But in the end she is as bitter as poison, as dangerous as a double-edged sword. Her feet go down to death; her steps lead straight to the grave.” Proverbs 5:3-5) (“Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never!” 1 Corinthians 6:15 NLT)

 7. LIE: Sex can be done leisurely with no feelings or strings attached.

 (“And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are united into one.”” 1 Corinthians 6:16)

 8. LIE: Because sexual urges are natural, it's impossible to abstain.

(“You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. And even though “I am allowed to do anything,” I must not become a slave to anything. You say, “Food was made for the stomach, and the stomach for food.” (This is true, though someday God will do away with both of them.) But you can’t say that our bodies were made for sexual immorality. They were made for the Lord, and the Lord cares about our bodies. And God will raise us from the dead by his power, just as he raised our Lord from the dead. Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are united into one.” But the person who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with him. Run from sexual sin! No other sin so clearly affects the body as this one does. For sexual immorality is a sin against your own body. Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself, for God bought you with a high price. So you must honor God with your body.” 1 Corinthians 6:12-20 NLT)

 9. LIE: We can live under grace when it comes to sexual immorality.

 (““At that time I will put you on trial. I am eager to witness against all sorcerers and adulterers and liars. I will speak against those who cheat employees of their wages, who oppress widows and orphans, or who deprive the foreigners living among you of justice, for these people do not fear me,” says the LORD of Heaven’s Armies.” Malachi 3:5) (“And we must not engage in sexual immorality as some of them did, causing 23,000 of them to die in one day.” 1 Corinthians 10:8) (“You can be sure that no immoral, impure, or greedy person will inherit the Kingdom of Christ and of God. For a greedy person is an idolater, worshiping the things of this world.” Ephesians 5:5 NLT) (“And don’t forget Sodom and Gomorrah and their neighboring towns, which were filled with immorality and every kind of sexual perversion. Those cities were destroyed by fire and serve as a warning of the eternal fire of God’s judgment.” Jude 1:7) (““But cowards, unbelievers, the corrupt, murderers, the immoral, those who practice witchcraft, idol worshipers, and all liars—their fate is in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death.”” Revelation 21:8)

 10. LIE: I can look as long as I don't touch.

(““You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. So if your eye—even your good eye —causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your hand—even your stronger hand —causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.” (Matthew 5:27-30 NLT)

(this article is Written by Destiny Nixton during her Sexual Morality Leadership training under the Mentorship of Rufus Elijah Yamoah)

Exposing Sexual Immorality in the New Age Church

“Notwithstanding I have a few things against thee, because thou sufferest that woman Jezebel, which calleth herself a prophetess, to teach and to seduce my servants to commit fornication, and to eat things sacrificed unto idols” (Revelation 2:20)

 And no wonder, for even Satan disguises himself as an angel of light.

--2 Corinthians 11:14

What is the New Age Church?

The New Age Church is the church that is pastor by Jezebel, the mother of all immorality.

The New Age Church is the church that practices religion but denies the power of God. (2 Timothy 3:5)

The New Age Church is the church the uses the Bible for preaching and teaching, yet rejects the Truth and the practice of holiness and righteousness.

The New Age Church is the church of the last days; a church that has driven out the Spirit of God and is now controlled by the spirit of error, seduction and deception. (1Timothy 4:1)

The New Age Church is the church of Satan.

The New Age Church is the Anti-Christ church that is ruled by men’s philosophies, traditions and inventions (Colossians 2:8)

Facing the Dimensions of Sexual Immorality in the Church

Apostle Paul Addressing the Corinthians Christians living in immorality on 1 Corinthians 5:

“It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and such sexual immorality as is not even named^[a] among the Gentiles—that a man has his father’s wife! ² And you are puffed up, and have not rather mourned, that he who has done this deed might be taken away from among you. ³ For I indeed, as absent in body but present in spirit, have already judged (as though I were present) him who has so done this deed. ⁴ In the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, when you are gathered together, along with my spirit, with the power of our Lord Jesus Christ, ⁵ deliver such a one to Satan for the destruction of the flesh, that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord Jesus.^[b]

⁶ Your glorying is not good. Do you not know that a little leaven leavens the whole lump? ⁷ Therefore purge out the old leaven, that you may be a new lump, since you truly are unleavened. For indeed Christ, our Passover, was sacrificed for us.^{[c] 8} Therefore let us keep the feast, not with old leaven, nor with the leaven of malice and wickedness, but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth.

⁹ I wrote to you in my epistle not to keep company with sexually immoral people. ¹⁰ Yet I certainly did not mean with the sexually immoral people of this world, or with the covetous, or extortioners, or idolaters, since then you would need to go out of the world. ¹¹ But now I have written to you not to keep company with anyone named a brother, who is sexually immoral, or covetous, or an idolater, or a reviler, or a drunkard, or an extortioner—not even to eat with such a person.

¹² For what have I to do with judging those also who are outside? Do you not judge those who are inside? ¹³ But those who are outside God judges. Therefore “put away from yourselves the evil person.”

               

 Here is Some Sexual Immorality in the New Age Church that must be handled.

1       The Gay Christians: Gay Christian movement is a religion or denomination that falls under the New Age Church. They claim that there are born again gays; after all Eunuchs in the Bible were gays. Some present Jesus has gay and even had sexual involvement with His disciples. People say Christianity is a free religion. Everything is allowed as long as you don’t harm others. Some said Ruth and Naomi were lesbians while David and Jonathan were homosexuals. God is so angry is gay practice…He destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah for homosexuality! (Jude 1:7). The church need to repent from this perversion!

2.       Flirting Believers: This is another category of Christians in the church who claim that they are into ‘Christian dating’. Believers now keep boyfriend and girlfriend just as the worldly people do. This practice has led many youth/teens into falling victims of sexual immorality. Flirting believers believes there is nothing wrong with engaging in the game of romance, kissing and mutual masturbation with your love partner as long as you do not engage in sexual intercourse. This theory is absolutely wrong! Sexuality is more than just intercourse. Sexual purity is more than just avoiding sexual intercourse. We must avoid this unholy relationship of flirting which lacks divine purpose and direction. We must avoid or stop unholy relationships.

3.       The Holy Kiss Madness: the church today, members are encouraged to give a holy kiss to fellow brethren as prescribed by Apostle Paul (Romans 16:16). Am I against Apostle Paul or the holy kiss? Of course, NO! it is just that from a careful research, we have found that this holy kiss madness has led many into falling prey of the spirit of lust which in turn has give birth to many unholy relationships among Christians and also caused sexual immorality. The bible says we should not give the devil a chance (Ephesians 4:27). The so called ‘holy kiss’ that was meant for greeting and love has been abused and is not been perverted and diverted for lustful passion and sexual defilement. We must be wise…the devil is a roaring lion!!!

4.       Holy Sex: it is shocking to hear about holy sex. The only true holy sex can only be found between legally married couples as commanded by the Word of God. Any form of sexual activity or fulfillment among singles/youth cannot the termed ‘holy’. In the new age church, they tell us that masturbation is not a sin, it is just a bad habit like every other habit, and that God is not against it. Wow! Today Christians sees sexual practices like pornography, fingering sex, oral sex and masturbation as acceptable by God as long as there is no sexual intercourse. They still tagged themselves as ‘virgins’ because they have not had sexual intercourse! What a show of shame and blindness! The church today only hit hard on fornication and adultery and refuse to talk about other forms of sexual fulfillment, forgetting that Jesus was not soft on anything that has to do with sex…warning that if a man looks at a woman to lust after her in the heart has already committed fornication (Matthew 5:28). Beware of the ‘holy sex’ saga!!!

5.       The Prayer Partners: today we see two prayer partners of opposite sex parading themselves alone both in Night vigils and house visitation in the name of ‘partnering in prayers to pull down the kingdom of darkness’. Unfortunately, these so called prayer partners are now the ones pulling themselves into the destruction of sexual immorality. When you are partnering with an opposite sex in prayers alone…be wise…be cautious! The devil is really fighting to pull down the prayer department of the body of Christ through the poison of sexual immorality. Beware!!!

6.       Pastoral Counseling Sessions: The pastoral counseling some years back was one of the most powerful tools in the body of Christ. This session was a demonstration of divine wisdom and knowledge to empower believers to make right decisions and directions in every area of the lives. It was so lovely…the glory of God was at work! But it is so painful to report to you that it is no longer so anymore, the pastors of the new age church have turned this divine session into a bed of immorality and corruption. They take advantage of female folks who come to them for help of advice and prayers and seduce and manipulate them into ministering to them through sexual performance! My God!

7.       The Sunday School Teacher and Student Relationship: There is another hidden evil going on in this area. The devil is really working so hard to destroy the church with immorality from every angle. Today, many students go to the houses of their Sunday school/Bible teacher is the aim to being close to their spiritual mentor, but they ended up as sexual victims or rape or even building secret sexual relationship with them. These male teachers are very good at hold private/home bible class with female teens/children alone. This has led the enemy to plant evil seed in their heart to destroy new believers in the church. We must be very carefully not to be over spiritual and neglect the principles of human body system. Remember, as long as we are in the flesh, we must be careful with our dealings with opposite sex whether young or old. We must avoid evil appearance and make no provision for the flesh or carnal mind.

What is God’s Will for the Church?

“He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault”. (Ephesians 5:27)

Listen my beloved brethren, much has been happening in the body of Christ concerning sexual immorality and this has made God’s Presence and Power to depart from the church.

My question is: “Are you a member of this New Age church? Do you live in any of these sexual behaviors?

It is time we come out and purity ourselves so that we can truly live as God’s chosen vessels of Honor and not to dishonor.

It is time to bring back our church from Sexual immorality and restore the glory of God in holiness and righteousness.

Building a purity community…

Rufus Yamoah

Sexual Morality Counselor